About The Little Miss Sunshine

A Happy Go Freshie!

‘If your mind is empty,

It is always ready for everything;

It is open to everything.

In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities;

In the expert’s mind there are few.”

(Shuriryu Suzuki, author, Zen Mind)(Oldach 1995)

That is what I like about being a freshie. Sometimes we are trying so hard to be clever but tragically ended up over-stylist. The more our mind is exposed to information, the harder we identify the core message. And sometimes an amateur can see the bigger picture than a perfectionist expert who pays too much attention on details.

The theory is this. We have only one instrument, it is the mind. It boils stimuli into perception. To perceive things truly as its original taste, the mind must be free from all conditioning (like a beginner does). And ironically be free of knowledge and experience, because knowledge diverse the mind and makes things twisted.

The enormous capacity of the mind to invent, to imagine, to speculate, to think, - must not be corrupted with the past experiences, here as designer, as in referencing to existing works. It is such a mind that can discover more than brain and mind itself, the originality. Otherwise, what we produce will be coloured by what we saw or have experienced before, and those are the results of our conditioning.

But being innocently un-exposed and empty sometimes keeps the mind in the box of only one point of view. The ideas play happily in the boundaries of concept and monochromatic perspective. In one sense it creates style. But doesn’t style imprison us from being flexible to adapt to different requirements from different clients? Besides, a lot of artists are inspired by the others as well, and If so, how can a style be a style if it is not original?

Oh, Mind! You are so complicated. But the mystery of it is still the motivation that drives me in this journey. And blame for giving you a headache for this complicated blog. ‘COS I AM COMPLICATED!

By A FRESH GRADUATE!!!

PS:

For you guys, fresh graduates!!! Please be confident and keep highly-motivated. We’re not like what the old fashioned baby-boomers thought of! They have money, they have experience. But we have fresh ideas, flexibility like a glass of clean water, and (hopefully) originality. GO and fight for your own destiny!

For my beloved friends over the sea, I know you guys care about me so much, but please do not worry about me! (And don’t pressure me lah, haha…). I might be a lil’ bit slow, but surely I’ll get my catch soon. Take care of yourself and if you got check me out constantly on my blog, please-lah leave some words so that I know I’m not forgotten. Haha… Miss you all…

Culture Shock? Me?

What? I got a culture shock in my very own hometown? Among the people I grew up with, on the land I was once proud of and admired, and below the same sky I gave birth to my biggest dreams… (Dreams that might forever be dreams, if I keep going with this mindset I bet).. What what what???

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Simple answer: Things are changing.

But for the most of all, I changed.

Injected by more open minded culture and some ‘belief’ exchanges in my training (read: life). I can’t blame myself for seeing things from different perspective now, and too bad that I am much more aware and sensitive to my socio-culture environment (then I started to notice weaknesses and comment about it), also so much arrogant and less patience.

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The hyperactive traffic with its nonstop ‘horns’ greeting and zigzag route has climbed over my tolerance.

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The slow and unplanned management washes away my motivation to live up the day.

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The glamorous wives in their 40s with tube top and puffy blonde hair reminds me to ‘The Devil Wears Prada.’

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The possessive boyfriends and my ‘behind bars’ girl friends give a slap on my face again and again. (why cant they open their mind and be a less conservative?)

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The awkward billboards that blocking the traffic light and the ‘pek thau ciao’ waiting like a starving overweighed herding dog ensures me for having hypertension on my older age.

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The hotspots and harmful haze that caused humiliation to our own firmness of ruling, and the corruptors that received the bribe to let that happened made me bloody sick and red all the time.

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And bla bla bla…

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Alrite, I ain’t a betrayal for telling the truth, am I?

Well, I am still proud of the courage and patriotism of the people, am still speechless when it comes to the richness of the land and the origin of the culture, and I still acknowledge the geniuses that were born in the countries but then left and contribute their brightness to others, ‘cos my homeland can’t effort to pay me’ they said…

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Who is it to blame? The brights that choose to have a better living somewhere out there because there is less chance for them to grow here, or the monopolyzing people here that choose not to change their management system or be more flexible and up for challenges.

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Now, spending my time jobless and ‘transport-less’ in my homy-landy, I choose to pretend to be an ethnographer, studying the people and their mindset and analyzing the factors that cause them to happen. Right here, in the place I was born, I am given 2^nd chance to know my people more in depth, and better.

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YeHa * 04 Sept 2006

boring waiting for uncertainty

Try It on My Own

Try It on My Own

by: Whitney Houston

I’m wiser now
I’m not the foolish girl you used to know
So long ago

I’m stronger now
I’ve learned from my mistakes which way to go
And I should know
I put myself aside to do it your way
But now I need to do it all alone

And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don’t care if I’m right or wrong
I’ll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I’ll keep it real you know
Time for me to do it on my own
Yeah yeah hmmm yeah yeah…

It’s over now
I can’t go back to living through your eyes
Too many lines
And if you don’t know by now
I can’t go back to being someone else
Not anymore
I never had a chance to do things my way
So now it’s time for me to take control

And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don’t care if I’m right or wrong
I’ll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I’m gonna keep it real you know
Time for me to do it

Oh I start again go back to one
I’m running things in my way
Can’t stop me now I’ve just begun
Don’t even think about it
There ain’t no way about it
I’m taking names the ones of mine
Yes I’m gonna take my turn
It’s time for me to finally stand alone, stand alone

I am not afraid to try it on my own
And I don’t care if I’m right or wrong
I’ll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I’m gonna keep it real you know
It’s time for me to do it
See I’m not afraid

A song dedicated to me by 95%.

Janet said it suited me a lot,

for my whole self had been uncovered for them to see through

And I dunt give a shit whether I it’s right or wrong,

as long as I know I’m gonna do it on my own way…

On my way… but not by my own, all de time…

… Cos I don’t wanna come to the end, with drops of success, but no one to share with.

Stay with me, no matter what I meant to you

As I will always love you.